Come to fabulous Burkina Faso!

By guest writer Troy McClure, spokesman for the Burkinabé Ministry of Tourism

Enjoy the charming company of Burkina's world-renowned faux types. As soon as you leave the airport, you'll be pleased to find helpful men all around you offering to carry your bag, find you a taxi, sell you phone cards, and helpfully point you to their store where you can find the African drum you've always wanted. Don't listen to the cynical Peace Corps Volunteers who will tell you that “faux type” means “false type.” In Burkina Faso “faux” means “friendly.” That they are!

Play in Burkina's very own version of the Olympics: transport! The first event is the Mad Scramble for a Seat. Push, shove, claw, and climb your way to a primo spot on the bus. Next is a group event: The Sardine Squish. Just how many people can fit into a bus? All aisles, overhead shelves, and laps must be filled! And the final event is the most extreme event of all: Get off the Bus! Go! Go! Go! Who will be the first off the bus? Will it be you?

Go on an African safari! Have you ever seen a goat? How about a chicken? Burkina's got them all!

Experience the worst night of sleep of your life! Sleep outside and let the soothing sounds of nature lull you to sleep: donkeys squeaking, goats blehing, and of course malaria-riddled mosquitoes buzzing by your head. Too hot for you? Don't worry. A dust storm will cool you down while also depositing most of the Sahara in your bed. Night night!