Harassment

Burkina is very hard to like sometimes. Regardless of how well integrated you are in your community, how well you speak the local language, how much your students' critical thinking skills have improved, as soon as you go somewhere people don't know you, you're just another white person. Since I'm a white person in Africa, I've been yelled at by children and adults, I've had touristy souvenirs shoved in my face so aggressively I have to push them out of the way so I can pass, men have grabbed me while I'm on my bike and through taxi windows, I've been laughed at, I've been stolen from. The way white people are treated is not going to change. The best a volunteer can do is try and ignore it and not let it get to you.

For two years I've had my blinders on, I've rationalized people's actions, and I've tried not to generalize one person's bad behavior to everyone. But yesterday, when I biked past a group of men doing road work and had dirt purposefully thrown at me, all my hard earned defenses against harassment broke down. Why would anyone throw dirt at a stranger? That's just awful no matter what country you're in and what race you are. Seeing that I was upset, Markus went back to the group of men, who just yelled and laughed at him. We sat down at the bar where we were meeting some friends, and I had a clear view of the road workers, who stared and laughed at me while I struggled not to cry. It didn't take long, though, before I had my emotions under control and was able to pay attention to the conversation.

It's my last month in Burkina, and I'd like very much to enjoy myself as I say goodbye to my home of two years, but things like this just make me happy to leave this place. It's hard, at the end of your service, not to instill every little experience with more meaning than it deserves. Just like it's hard not to feel incredibly silly when you catch yourself thinking, “Oh, poor little white me. I have so much money and opportunity and I'm being harassed by Africans.” But some behaviors just can't be excused by such major issues as slavery, colonialism, and poverty. Some behaviors are just people being assholes. Realizing that those men are just jerks and observing how quickly I squashed my feelings of self-pity made me feel much better about myself. Living in Burkina has made me much more resilient, which makes all the bad treatment I've experienced worth it.